Raging fires and devastating drought have overwhelmed this part of the world that we call home and it really has felt like life imploded over the last twelve months.
Like the internal and external environments around us have reflected and refracted the same theme and there’s been little reprieve from the onslaught..
Impossible diagnosis had launched herself into our stratosphere and we were caught in the whirlwind of trying to process exactly what those words would mean to the way life needed to be walked.
January held Acute Myeloid Leukemia,
June a heart attack then strokes x 4 Life shattering disability following in its wake
August marriage and family collapsed in an avalanche of lies undone. If lies were liquid the drought would have broke by now a thousand times over.
But they arnt so water got scarcer. The green pastures turned to dry cracked earth and trees and gardens of our own oasis die.
Temperatures rise quickly with summer coming earlier then she used to . No afternoon storms this year to break the heat. Just hot dry parched landscape. Selfishly I’m thankful for their lack. Storm watching was a favorite pass time in years of love gone by.
Fire season struck with vengeance burning hard and fast with no escape It seemed the whole world might burn and there was no stopping it.
The blue sky disappearing behind walls of smoke for weeks on end the earth here bathed in orange glow. Nights moon shone red through the acrid haze. Ash fall on everything and its like gazing at life through a sepia lense.
Colourless…void and dying.
But we were blessed . Spared the losses that others have faced …it stopped being a question of if but when the fires come and I realised that was exactly like our life.
Inevitable it is that pain will come. Heartache is it seems an equal opportunist of truest form.
And whilst I cry out at the injustice. At the disappointment ,and the needless mess.
I find necessity to get back up. Can’t hover here in despair..
I’m not fighting flames that threaten to consume but the dark that seeks to infiltrate this space that’s carved for glorys presence..
And in the fight to stand back up.. I find my voice….the breaking holds blessings in disguise and isn’t this the way of freedoms walk ?
I find courage seeping into the empty spaces..spured on by those who hold integrities hand. Despondent prayers are flung heavenwards and the troposphere cracks her reluctant floodgates…
Rain downpours as a Christmas wish come true drenching our arid earth and barren hearts a fresh with glorious liquid blessing.
Fires are extingished by heavens own hand and we are ever awed.
The reprieve this brings is divine intervention to an overdone soul.
The danger isn’t gone completely,theres still blazes to be fought. But each new step forward, Each time my gaze shifts higher, we gain ground.
Freedom comes at the cost of heartbreak a result of trust mislayed .Its a bitter lesson learnt.
Rain holds the promise of restoration..its grace tangible.
The dark retreats and glory edges back .A voice rises up louder then before. Wings stretch out ,arms link and we advance untouched.
Smoke and mirrors still try their hand at shaking this new courage that we’ve found.Threats seek to shut down this boldness.But it seems freedom has unshackled controls rigid grip and we will have none of that.
Faith stirs deep again feeding on glorys fire and I learn that burning bridges can it seems illiminate better the way then floodlights ever could.
Rain will come eventually. Droughts will break . Rivers will flow and life will begin again… The glory space will hold strong and despair will be a distant memory.